Posted by Mary Caraccioli | Filed under the working life
A few years back I went to Pebble Beach to do a story on how the sport of golf is used in business. It was the perfect place to do the story. The big Pro-Am tournament was taking place and top exec from the biggest companies were there and willing to talk (It is one of the most gorgeous places on earth- how could they not be in a good mood).
What the bosses told me is that golf is an excellent way to size up someone you may do business with. You can see how they handle adversity, find out if they cheat, and determine if they are someone you can be in the same room with for an extended period of time. Here is a link: http://maryandmoney.com/videos/beyond-the-us-open-how-golf-can-make-you-rich/ What a fun way to decide who you will do business with, right? But what if you don’t play? Does that mean you don’t get the deal or the job? It was not lost on me that there were very few women at the event. One female CEO was invited. finding her in the sea of men was like a needle in a haystack.
I was reminded of that day today when talking to my friend Judy about the impact of socialization (or the lack of it) on career building. Working moms I lamented, don’t have the time to fit in 18 holes (as much as the idea of hanging out at fabulous resorts working on my game appeals to me). So it got me thinking what if we built a new litmus test for potential partners: A Play-date! Get the foursome together, but instead of golf we hit the playground or the library.
You learn much more about a person watching them with kids. How do they handle a crisis (leaky diaper), inter-office squabbles (a fight over a toy), constant interruptions to work flow (Mom, Dad – I need you!). The list goes on and on. You really find out what someone is made of when you see how they behave in front of their kids. You may discover the jerk has a heart or the smooth operator is actually a complete– well you know. I also think it would open our eyes to the variety of skills needed to create a successful outcome. I see it everyday with the moms and dads I encounter at the playground or school. We often share a common goal (creating a good life for our kids) and we each bring different insights and abilities in our pursuit of that goal and we often work together because we know we can not do it alone.
I know the idea has tons of flaws, after-all not everyone has kids, but look at it like a first draft. Help me perfect it. BTW I don’t see this as men versus women. I see it as an evolving work-life discussion. Working and raising kids can actually be a very isolating experience, you don’t fully belong to either world. Neither the 18-hole club or the stay-at-home tribe accept you. How can we improve that for everyone?
Tags: working moms